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| Left to right: Pope John the Malefactor, Seminex Reborn as Church Growth; Mirthless Mark, Seminex Reborn as Church Growth; Archbishop Liz, Seminex Bishops and Pastors; Matt the Fatt, Seminex Reborn as Church Growth. Results: total unity, Objective Justification Universalism, massive membership losses, half-empty seminaries, women's ordination, promotion of safe sects, but the bosses keep their deluxe jobs, pay, and benefits. |
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| All four sect leaders call themselves Confessional Lutherans, but they oppose what the Book of Concord confessions clearly teach. Not to worry - they will sell more and better dogmatics books at first edition prices. No, the new LCMS Small Catechism is not the Large Catechism - it is the try-to-find-Luther pseudo-catechism, 400 pages. |
The gravitational pull of apostasy has brought the brethren and sistern together in one massive cesspool of doctrinal error, Calvinistic edu-tainment, and hymnal multiplication. How many awful hymnals have these clowns sold at obscene prices in the last few decades?
The only thing Lutheran about them is their name, which they are keen to drop whenever starting a new mission, playing with real estate like Monopoly board game losers.
