This Mission Satire Is Too Close to Home for WELS and Missouri. Fox Valley Has Most of the Nimrod Strategy in Place

http://donutchurch.com/

Cool

Make no mistake about it, we are the coolest church in town and we know it.  We have the coolest leaders, the coolest stage, the coolest fashions, the coolest music, the coolest light shows, and the coolest facilities.  In fact, if we didn’t have the word “church” in our name or on our marquee, you almost wouldn’t know that we are a church.  We pride ourselves on our ability to keep up with the latest trending fads both in the church and in the world.  We have the best of both worlds because your church experience should be cool.

Convenient

We don’t ever want church to interfere with your private life. We understand that you’re often too busy for God so we provide many options by which you can have a weekly religious experience whether it be by offering only one service a week (so you don’t feel bad for missing two or three), service streaming, online tithing, in-foyer tithe kiosks, in-sanctuary food services, or by having the service pushed directly to your smart phone. We do what we can to make your church experience as easy as possible.

Casual

At Donut Church we don’t honor God with our best and we feel you shouldn’t have to either.  All of our services require very casual dress.  In fact, if you come dressed nice to one of our services you’ll feel very much out of place.  Everything we do at Donut Church is, in fact, very lax.

non-Committal

We aren’t looking to actually grow or disciple you so don’t feel pressured to commit.  Truthfully, we’re just happy you come to one service a month and help pad our numbers.  You’ve helped to make us the fastest growing church in town and in return, we don’t require anything out of you.

non-Confrontational

Through years of experience we have discovered that the Bible, when preached fully and fervently, is very confrontational and often downright offensive.  For that reason, we have slowly backed off the Bible teachings and are quite proud to offer lessons and messages we call “Bible-lite.”  While we do still teach the Bible, we purposely avoid all of the heavy-handed stuff about eternal judgment, wrath, repentance, dead works, holiness, and sin.  We consider this new Gospel to be a message of motivational positivity injected with a temporal hope, yet devoid of any truth-based accountability.  Hence our motto: Light, Fluffy, Sugarcoated.

Comfortable

Above all things, we at Donut Church aim to make things comfortable for you at church, after all, you’ve probably had a hard week at church. For this reason we somewhat disagree with all of Jesus’ talk about taking up your cross and taking His yoke upon us, and we totally disagree with Paul’s teaching on keeping your flesh under daily and crucifying the flesh with its desires and appetites. It is our belief that church should be a fun experience for the spirit, soul, and body. For that reason, be of good cheer, we will not expect you to mature in Christ nor will we not put a demand on you spiritually. At Donut Church, you get to serve God as you see fit, how you see fit, when you see fit, and you get to walk with him at your pace. In a sense, we see God as our Santa Claus, and we get to write the clause.

Rolf Synod's Nasty Little Introduction

The Rolf Synod began when Pope John the Malefactor began kicking pastors out of the Little Sect on the Prairie. Moldstad told Rolf's congregation they would be kicked out of the ELS if they did not fire Rolf, so they did.

This group calls themselves the ACLC, whatever that means, but they soon parted company with Rolf - who left the LCMS for the ELS, got kicked out of the ELS, formed the Rolf Synod, got pushed out there, and came crawling back to the LCMS, rejected at first but finally (and reluctantly) accepted. Nevertheless, Rolf publicly supports his former sect.

Those who teach a universal forgiveness and absolution - without faith - cannot get along with each other. Thus Rolf's synod broke with him. Paul McCain turned against his back channel pal Herman Otten, even though both adore UOJ and sneak in Romanism however they can.

The SkunkPatch called LutherQuest (sic) is famous for their Max und Morris behavior with their "friends," but they are united by UOJ.

WELS and the Little Sect on the Prairie despise one another, but they teach nothing except UOJ. The only thing they like about the LCMS (besides money) is UOJ.

I could tell this would be a weak piece of whining when the Rolf Synod began their report by complaining they were robbed by ELDONA.

The ELDoNA scheduled Rev. Rydecki as sole presenter on the topic of Justification at their 2013 Colloquium. Unfortunately, following his presentation of “The Forensic Appeal to the Throne of Grace” only about 15 minutes of the scheduled time remained for discussion. At the beginning of Rev. Rydecki’s colloquy interview, the bishop of the ELDoNA, the Rt. Rev. James Heiser, stated that no questions on Objective Justification would be entertained. At the conclusion of the interview, Bishop Heiser informed Rev. Rydecki that the ELDoNA found no error in his theology at all, but nevertheless his application would be put on hold until the ELDoNA had adopted her theses on Justification. This, he said, was in order to be fair to Rev.
Rydecki so that he would know for certain the ELDoNA’s position on this doctrine before entering the diocese. Acta Apostolorum, Rolfus Synodum.

I have no connection with any of this, but I can guess why Heiser did not let the Rolf Synod or anyone else get on the topic of UOJ. I have experienced their madness whenever they latch onto the topic. They brush aside Luther's doctrine, Paul's epistles, the Bible itself, and the Book of Concord - to obsess about their one and only term, which did not appear until recently, coming from Calvinistic and Pietistic sources.

As one of their mindless leaders, F. Bivens, wrote - in harmony with all of them - UOJ is the Chief Article of the Christian Faith, the master and prince, etc - directly contradicting the Reformation.

Unbelief rages against faith, which explains why UOJ finds complete unity among all its allies (including ELCA) and opposes justification by faith with demonic wrath.

Navigation - Rolf Synod Rejection of Justification by Faith - Attacks ELDONA

Pastor Steve Brockdorf, Rolf Synod UOJ Advocate

ELDONA Justification by Faith Links

Free copy of Thy Strong Word - UOJ and JBFA Arguments Compared

Pastor Paul Rydecki's Scholarly Works on Justification

Rolf Synod Opposes Justification by Faith - Link to Report

Fresh Blast of Flatulence from SpenerQuest

Rolf Synod's Nasty Little Introduction

Using the Ad Hominem - "Rydecki's Justification"

"Steadfast Lutherans", Jay Webber, Etc - Pastor Rydecki Answers

Luther-Queasies at Work and Play

"Steadfast"Fallacies - Blaming Ichabod for Justification by Faith

Steadfast Author Scheer Picks Fight about UOJ

Hitler Tries To Quash Rolf Synod's Attacks on Justification by Faith

Unsteady Lutherans versus Brett Meyer

Rev. Paul Rydecki
February 24th, 2014 at 17:17
I haven’t kept up with the discussion, but I did note that someone above referenced Jack Kilcrease’s article from 2012 about me, so I figured I’d also link my two responses to him:

• http://www.faithalonejustifies.com/brief-response-to-dr-kilcrease/
• http://www.faithalonejustifies.com/why-would-i-want-to-debate-kilcrease-another-response-to-his-posts-about-me/

Jim Pierce, "Steadfast Lutherans" UOJ Stormtrooper

Author Archive -- Jim Pierce

Jim Pierce is a layman from Seattle, Washington. He is a blogger and author. He is a graduate of the University of Washington and has a career in systems administration. By the mercy and grace of God, his journey has taken him away from Pentecostalism into eighteen years of atheism, and he is now at peace as a Confessional Lutheran where he attends Messiah Lutheran Church in Seattle with his dear wife Suzanne and their two children.