Wednesday, April 1, 2009

As Pants the Heinz:
Church Growth May Be Scraping Bottom Soon




Perhaps some should try this at their Lutheran Community Church.

I feel so cheated. At church Sunday I didn’t get to see someone get squirted with ketchup (?) while he sang on stage with flashing lights and special effects. When you go to Ed Young’s church you never know what you’ll encounter, like the Sunday he dragged a bed onto the “stage” to talk sex. Ketchup-enhanced singers and sex talk. Time for the rest of you pastors out there to get caught up on hip ministry these days. Bibles, by the way, are optional.

Slice of Laodicea is an Evangelical website devoted to slicing and dicing the apostasy around us. One section is dedicated to Mega-church Follies.

Their third-rate slapstick comedy often replaces the Gospel, reminding me of various Lutheran Church Shrinkers of the past and present.

Some churches welcome pets.

Thanks to one of many researchers - Joseph F. Schmidt.

I prefer:

As pants the hart for cooling streams,
When heated in the chase,
So longs my soul, O God, for Thee
And Thy refreshing grace.

For Thee, my God, the living God,
My thirsty soul doth pine;
O, when shall I behold Thy face,
Thou majesty divine?

Why restless, why cast down, my soul?
Hope still; and thou shalt sing
The praise of Him Who is thy God,
Thy health’s eternal spring.

To Father, Son, and Holy Ghost,
The God Whom we adore,
Be glory as it was, is now,
And shall be evermore.