Things To Do During the Collapse of The Lutheran Church
The question is no longer whether the established synods will collapse but when people will finally acknowledge that the wonderful one-horse shay of the Lutheran Church has fallen into pieces.
J-1043
“Have you heard of the wonderful one–hoss shay,
That was built in such a logical way
It ran a hundred years to the day…
You see, of course, if you’re not a dunce
How it went to pieces all at once,
All at once and nothing first,
Just as bubbles do when they burst,
End of the wonderful one-hoss shay,
Logic is logic. That’s all I say.”
Oliver Wendell Holmes, (1809-1894), The Deacon’s Masterpiece, A Logical Story, 1854.
The poem is a humorous description of how Puritanism collapsed in New England all at once in spite of its reliance upon logic. The one-hoss shay was built by the parson to last forever and just fell apart. In New England we can see that the Calvinists soon became Unitarians. Almost at once Yale went from teaching the inerrancy of the Bible to making fun of the Virgin Birth in a student/faculty evening of entertainment, where Benjamin Bacon was put on trial and accused of believing in the ancient doctrine.
The established synods are covered in flop-sweat from studying their own statistics. Their worship attendance and regular offerings will plummet in the next two decades, after many previous years of decline. The Tetzels have never done better, holding the feeble hands of elderly widows as they sign irrevocable gifts over to the synod, making their dupes think they are helping their church (as in congregations) when they are dumping treasure on the synod. The estate gifts will increase the arrogance of the synod officials and the decline of the Lutheran Church, similar to giving a wastrel a lump sum of money to improve his life and character.522 As noted before, the synods also face a precipitous decline in ordinations at a time when all the professions are recruiting the same people.523 Once, late entry into seminary was looked upon with great skepticism and discouraged in every possible way. One bishop said, “Men who enter the ministry late also tend to leave quickly, because they cannot abide the way they are treated. We do better with young men who have never enjoyed the benefits and efficiency of the business world.” Now the conservative seminaries are filled with older men, who are no less able to serve than younger men. However, the new seminary graduates have far fewer years to serve in the ministry, even if they stay until retirement.
Roman doctrine has taken over the Lutheran synods to such an extent that the pyramid of lapdogs all teach what his excellency, the Antichrist, infallibly declares in Rome. Some of them are a little shy about Marian doctrine and Purgatory, but they emphatically stand for the substance of papal error, as listed below:
1. Each time Lutheran leaders want to assault a Biblical doctrine, they declare that it is suddenly a “gray area of Scripture.” The word “gray” is stretched out, as in g – r – a – y. As Chemnitz noted, this is the tactic used by Rome when clobbered in public debates while using the Scriptures to defend themselves. The Church of Rome originated the historical critical method to dispose of the Word. Indefensible errors are beyond the reach of the clear Word of God, because God has hidden His will in many g – r – a – y passages. Once the clarity (perspicuity) of the Scriptures is jettisoned, all sound doctrine vanishes.524
2. The ultimate authority is the visible church, not the Scriptures or the writings of orthodox theologians. Lutherans hide behind the most obnoxious attacks on the Christian faith by saying, “The synod has said,” reminding me of the periodical in the Notre Dame library, The Pope Speaks. In addition, no one can question false doctrine when the synod has established it as true, whether it is justification without faith (LCMS, WELS, ELS) or self-love (Church of the Lutheran Confession, Concordia Lutheran Conference).
3. Tradition is more important than the Word of God, and the pope (synod president) decides what this ever-changing tradition is. The little Antichrists will make ministers and laity pay for questioning their infallible authority. It’s fun to be the pope.
4. Lutherans have pursued the cult of personality as assiduously as the Church of Rome and the Reformed. Instead of extolling the ministry of the Word, discerning the spirits, and judging according to Scriptures, Lutheran leaders cover their foul deeds by assuming a cloak of invulnerability. “He is not a false teacher. He is a nice guy.” That response is no more Scriptural than saying, “I will not discuss doctrine with you, because you are a bad person.” Watch the work of various Lutheran synods and see how the public relations people glory in the person holding the office rather than in the Means of Grace.
5. Lutheran leaders believe in justification according to works. The entire system has been based upon leaders posing as great church builders, politicians, and man-pleasers, devoid of any firm theological convictions ever since the 1930s. Just as the pope rises to his position through a lifetime of deft political moves, so the Lutheran synods have rewarded wily politicians for positioning themselves as pragmatic saviors of the synod. Theologians are pets to be dragged to conferences, not leaders of the synod.
6. Lutheran leaders agree with the Antichrist that no one is really forgiven. Graciousness is gone from the Lutheran Church, especially among the conservative poseurs. The lack of clergy candidates may be based upon years of observing various synod leaders obstruct justice when their pals are criminals, meanwhile crushing faithful men and destroying their capacity to do any meaningful work while driving them from the ministry and slandering them in the process.
7. The Church of Rome has its Opus Dei, a secret society dedicated to accumulating power. Lutheran groups have their own secret groups as well. The pan-Lutheran homosexual network is one. Some in ELCA simply call it the Network. The Church Growth Janissaries are another faction, eager to denounce their opponents while denying their true allegiance. The unfeminine feminists are yet another network, working with other activists to obtain their Beelzebub-given rights.
Drop Out of Synod Politics
Once we have a proper understanding of the one-hoss shay, pastors can proceed in one of two directions. The first direction is to stay in the same synod [except ELCA] and withdraw from all political efforts, memorials, resolutions, and elections of synodical saviors. It bears repeating that Lutheran pastors will not accomplish God’s work by using Satan’s methods. The moment Lutherans think they can win by electing the right politician, they have defeated themselves by trusting in men rather than the Word. That is why Christian News has been a spectacular failure. Stop by the office of Pastor Herman Otten and you will realize that it is the switchboard for all synodical political moves. Certain appointed men leak the synod’s version of events to Otten, usually asking that these leaks not be published. Marcus Nitz did this for WELS. Steve Kurtzahn did the spin-doctoring for the Church of the Lutheran Confession. Paul McCain is the back door for Al Barry in the LCMS. The ELS gets its message across, helped by the connection with various Ottens attending Bethany College. Fortunately for all of the designated leakers, Herman believes the last person who talked to him. Therefore, the Lutheran switchboard is constantly buzzing with stories, counter-claims, outraged covert answers, denunciations, plots and strategies. The synods make their points through Otten, and the political circles within those synods counter-thrust through Christian News. It is such jolly fun because the conservatives constantly lose ground while congratulating one another on their astute political moves.
If a car has foundered in the mud, and spinning the tires makes it even more stuck, the driver will eventually stop revving the engine and find another solution. Pastors who think they can switch synods [except for leaving ELCA] for a more conservative one are in a dream world, because all the synods are part of the same pyramid of lapdogs. Leaving a synod means giving up friends and adopting a new set of enemies. Bloodlines cross synodical boundaries, so knowing a Tiefel in the CLC is no improvement over meeting one in the WELS. Someone from another synod is never accepted and can never object to anything, because he is “not one of ours.” The Missouri Synod can absorb ELCA pastors who have seen the light, but the smaller synods are horribly inbred, suspicious, and jealous. As Jake Preus, former governor of Minnesota and founder of Lutheran Brotherhood, warned his sons Jack and Robert, the Evangelical Lutheran Synod was too small and petty for men with ability. Jack and Robert were often panned for leaving the ELS for the LCMS, but it can also be said that the ELS made sure the Preus brothers were not welcome, especially since they came over from the much larger Evangelical Lutheran Church. Worst of all, both men had doctorates in a synod (the ELS) where no one else did. Once Ylvisaker and the Preus brothers were gone, the ELS had no intellectual leadership.
Since changing synods is not a worthwhile option, it is good to redesign one’s life according to faith in the efficacy of the Word. The pastor’s primary concern is the spiritual welfare of his congregation. He can simply spend all his time working on the sermon, the classes he teaches, and visitation. When he teaches the pure Word of God without compromise, people will be drawn to the congregation and others will be outraged. The Word will accomplish God’s will, whether it means staying in the congregation as it grows stronger or leaving under a hail of abuse and beginning an independent congregation. Conflict will draw the pastor closer to the Word. Historical antecedents will become especially interesting to study. The Book of Concord and Bente’s Historical Introductions are not at all boring when they are lifelines to doctrinal sanity and clarity. Every time Robert Mueller, Wally Oelhaven, or Floyd Stolzenburg promoted Reformed doctrine, I went back to my office and studied the classic works of the Lutheran Church.
Proclaiming the Efficacious Word
The typical minister has many different opportunities for broadcasting the Word of God and seeing a harvest:
1. The parish newsletter can be a source of spiritual wisdom and doctrinal teaching rather than a whip to admonish people to greater levels of activity and giving.
2. Sermons can be printed and recorded on audio and video tape.
3. The worship bulletin, as noted previously, provides as many as 64 places to discuss the Scriptures and quote great Lutheran theologians.
4. Many cable television stations must give access to local groups, including churches. At tiny Bethany in New Ulm, we provided weekly doctrinal talks on local cable television for about a year. It is quite a challenge, but worth the effort.
5. Many congregations now have web pages, so their space can be used to broadcast essays, sermons, and links all over the world. Many of us contact each other only through email and the Internet. Using the website wizard, Microsoft Publisher will create a website with art in a few minutes. The Publisher file converts itself to HTML files. The HTML files can then be loaded on many different free sites, including ones with no ads.
6. A congregation can reprint a classic no longer circulating, but needed by Lutherans. The cost is difficult for one person to bear but relatively easy for a congregation. Sales will make the effort pay for itself or at least reduce any financial loss.
7. The act of supporting newly published classic Lutheran books by buying them will help keep them in print.
8. The congregations owe their children more than passing them through the grades and confirming them in a perfunctory fashion. Every child should reach maturity with a knowledge of the Book of Concord and a love for the Christ-centered hymns of the Lutheran Church.
