Tuesday, August 28, 2012

Abusive Churches: Leaving Them Behind

Pastoral care in abusive church bodies.
Abusive Churches: Leaving Them Behind:


In a previous article called Abusive Churches, I discussed the characteristics of abusive churches.(1) As a result of the questions and feedback I have received, I felt it might be helpful to share some positive steps to recovery from an abusive church experience.

Leaving an unhealthy church situation can leave some very deep scars. One example of the collateral damage is a very painful exit process. Those who leave an unhealthy church situation suffer isolation, bitterness, embarrassment, grief, and anger. This is coupled with confusion and wondering how God could let this happen. They also chide themselves for getting into such a group and staying in the organization as long as they did.


'via Blog this'

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Pastor emeritus Nathan Bickel has left a new comment on your post "Abusive Churches: Leaving Them Behind":

Ichabod -

This is an excellent article which you have linked. I especially like what it says about "abusive leaders." Sadly and pathetically, so, I believe that is happening in many Christian churches; Lutheran churches, included.

Here, is the portion of what I am referring [to]:

Excerpt:

>>>>>>>> ........ Abusive leaders use their position to demand loyalty and submission. Ken Blue states, "I have heard many pastors say to their congregations, 'Because I am the pastor, you must follow me.' Their demand was not based on truth or the God-directedness of their leadership but on their title. That is a false basis of authority . . . any appeal to authority based on position, title, degree or office is false. The only authority God recognizes and to which we should submit to is truth." ....... <<<<<<<<

http://www.batteredsheep.com/abusive_02.html

I still think that what seminaries and Bible [leader] schools lack is a practical training for their perspective pastoral graduates. Would that these schools pumping out candidates to fill Christian pulpits have "on the job" training on sheep farms, learning the whole process of tending and caring for a sheep fold. So much of the Scripture's terminology is related in Shepard and sheep metaphors. Also, in that same vein of thought, it would not hurt for perspective pastors to work in some vineyards; learning the cycle of planting to wine press pressing.

Finally, - and, I hate to refer again to the common error, now rampant in Christendom; that being, the preached and promulgated error of General Universalism; but, I see how that destructive doctrine hinders the full fledge teaching and preaching about the Holy Spirit. And, when pastors ignore the Holy Spirit; they become abusive. I believe that there is a direct linkage.

Nathan M. Bickel

www.thechristianmessage.org

www.moralmatters.org

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solafide (http://solafide.myopenid.com/) has left a new comment on your post "Abusive Churches: Leaving Them Behind":

I agree that there needs to be more emphasis on actually serving the needs of the flock instead of the constant pedestal building that happens, especially in the WELS schools.

Very few pastors overseeing vicars and teachers overseeing student teachers concentrate on the really important things. They're all too worried about learning how to write a sermon (they can't do this before vicar year?! seriously, I know pastors who spent weeks getting a vicar's sermon up to par) or teaching that perfect math lesson. Of course, these aspects are important, but the most important aspect is preaching and teaching the Gospel.

As I said, MLC is too busy building and putting teachers on pedestals with advanced degrees and certifications, and the "pastor" has always been put on a pedestal, and now WLS grads are making sure people know that they are better - they know Greek!