Thursday, February 5, 2015

Funny Drunk Stories

Ski and Glende promoted The CORE as a coffee house ministry,
but they turned it into a bar ministry. 


I am not against social drinking, but I question the necessity of lubricating ecclesiastical meetings with cash bars, as WELS and Roman Catholic clergy do. Both are notorious for their alcoholic clergy.

I met with a Holy Cross priest at Notre Dame, part of my requirements for one course. His nose glowed red all the time. Over-indulgence causes gin blossoms or ruptured blood vessels.

Notre Dame theology conferences always began with a cash bar, just like the WELS worship conferences. One theologian showed up drunk and gave his talk, which might have been a comedy sketch on TV, it was so bad.

At one WELS district meeting, the nurse-missionary was obviously intoxicated when she was speaking to everyone.

I waited on alcoholics when I worked at my father's bakery. Sometimes they thought they were quite eloquent. They might not have thought so if they listened to tapes of themselves. They were nasty drunks. WELS pastors, protecting Holy Mother Sect, sound like nasty drunks - full of themselves, irrational, hyper-irritated know-it-alls.

If you want to hear another version of WELS talking points, endlessly repeated, then listen to drunks talk. WELS clergy say, "If you can find a perfect synod, join it, and then it will not be perfect, because you just joined it, and you are imperfect." (That excuses all false doctrine and every form of abuse.) Drunks say, "Let go and let God." And - "I'm sick and I'm tired. And I'm sick and tired of being sick and tired." That must be clever, too, the first 100 times.

At one convention, an LCA pastor got so drunk afterwards, when we all went out together, that a younger woman offered to drive him back. He could hardly walk, so he must have been many drinks ahead of us when he arrived.

At another event, an LCA pastor was so desperate to keep drinking that he offered to buy drinks for anyone who stayed with him. Everyone left him, and he was fairly young, already deep into his addiction.

One WELS pastor was so addicted that he gathered all the apples from a member's apple orchard, the leftovers, so he could brew apple jack for himself.

I know a WELS member who was in charge of dragging the pastor out of bars. I guess that was a bar ministry.

One WELS pastor drove his car up a utility pole in a DUI. He became a WELS missionary.

One WELS DP was arrested on a DUI, so the synod moved him to another district, so everyone could forget it happened.

Does anyone think an alcoholic father is a good example to his children, wife and congregation? But WELS and the other sectarians will not admit to their addictions.

WELS really needs more bar ministries, so drunken clergy can drink while pretending to take the Gospel to their fellow drunks. And the WELS Gospel is so appropriate for that ministry - Every sin---past, present, and future--is already forgiven. UOJ.

WELS bought this bankrupt bar for Ski and Glende,
then loaned the congregation enough money to
clean up the vomit smells and make a fakey church out of it.