Chastity Is Contagious? - So Is Adultery

WELS Pastor Robert Fleischmann, Christian Life Resources

A Secretary is Not a Toy

Lyrics - From How To Succeed in Business Without Really Trying

Send “A Secretary is Not a Toy” Ringtone to Your Cell

Gentlemen. Gentlemen.
A secretary is not a toy,
No, my boy, not a toy
To fondle and dandle and playfully handle
In search of some puerile joy.
No, a secretary is not,
Definitely not, a toy.

You're absolutely right, Mr. Bratt.
We wouldn't have it any other way, Mr. Bratt.
It's a company rule, Mr. Bratt.

A secretary is not a toy,
No, my boy, not a toy.
So do not go jumping for joy, boy.
A secretary is not . . .
A secretary is not . . .
A secretary is not a toy.

A secretary is not to be
Used for play therapy.
Be good to the girl you employ, boy.
Remember no matter what
Neurotic trouble you've got
A secretary is not a toy.

She's a highly specialized key component
Of operational unity,
A fine and sensitive mechanism
To serve the office community.
With a mother at home she supports;
And you'll find nothing like her at FAO Schwarz.

A secretary is not a pet
Nor an e-rector set.
It happened to Charlie McCoy, boy:
They fired him like a shot
The day the fellow forgot
A secretary is not a toy.

A secretary is not a toy.
And when you put her to use . . .
Observe when you put her to use . . .
That you don't find the name "Lionel"
On her caboose.

A secretary is not a thing
Wound by key, pulled by string.
Her pad is to write in
And not spend the night in.
If that's what you plan to enjoy.
No!!

The secretary ya got,
Is definitely not
Employed to do a gavotte,
Or you know what.

Before you jump for joy,
Remember this, my boy,
A secretary is not
A tinkertoy!

---

Chastity's Contagious, posted at Christian Life Resources.

By Rev. Thomas H. Trapp, WELS Campus Pastor at the University of Wisconsin-Madison
Source: Beginnings, March 1989, Vol. 9, No. 1


Despite the age of this article, it is nevertheless included on this website for your information.

Chastity's contagious. Think of two people on a date. One insists on chastity; the other's going to practice it too. It's contagious! It's also 100 percent safe (as well as God-pleasing). But not everyone practices chastity. The result of unchaste living are STDs -- sexually- transmitted diseases. The U.S. Surgeon General reports that they are one of the great health threats to the American public today.

To protect people from STDs, school-based health centers and other government agencies are handing out condoms and other birth control items to students. Some public officials feel it's the solution to the problem. While the government's solution may be treating the symptom, it's not treating the root of the problem. The root of the problem of premarital and extramarital sex is not STDs but sexual intercourse. The best way to prevent STDs is to teach unmarried people to say "no" to sexual intercourse and "yes" to chastity.

But some will immediately object: "Our students are unable to say 'no' to sex. They must be given birth control devices." But isn't it peculiar that some of the same people who argue that youth are unable to say "no" to sexual intercourse feel that youth, however, are able to say "no" to drugs? Isn't it inconsistent? Don't young people have the same ability to say "no" to sex, as they have to say "no" to drugs? Non-Christians have the threat of disease, pregnancy and the fear of personal and emotional havoc to motivate them to say "no" to both sex and drugs, while Christians additionally have the power of God and the love of Christ behind them to say "no."

Why put our youth "down" as if they are incapable of saying "no" to actions that can harm them? And why, especially, put Christian young people "down" in whom God the Holy Spirit dwells? He can give them the power they need to respect their Godgiven bodies for whom Jesus died (1 Corinthians 6:18-20). Young people (as well as adults) can say "no" to the sin of premarital and extra-marital sex. And when they say "no," they can spread a different contagious "disease" -- a good one -- chastity.

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WELS Pastor Thomas Trapp had his church (below) join the Willow Creek Association, to get discounts on workshops there. Apparently, he dropped that membership.

History

In 1964 the WELS began an independent campus ministry near State and Gilman Streets. Our first campus pastor was Richard Balge who served during the riot years of 1964-1971 and who oversaw the construction of our 1966 Chapel-Student Center at 220 West Gilman Street. Dr. Wayne Schmidt, an accomplished musician, pastured [GJ - put the sheep out to pasture? or pastored?] the Chapel from 1971-1975. Paul Kelm, who became a professor at Wisconsin Lutheran College, ministered to students from 1976-1979. Thomas Trapp is the current campus pastor and came in October, 1979.

Charis->Church and Change->Parish Services WELS

An imaginary graph from the WELS Church Growth Gurus.




Wisconsin Lutheran College

Pastor Ron Heins to become executive director of CHARIS
July 18, 2006

Pastor Ron Heins has accepted the position of executive director of CHARIS The Institute of Wisconsin Lutheran College. He will assume his new position after he returns from teaching at Asia Lutheran Seminary in Hong Kong during the fall. Heins will begin as executive director of CHARIS effective in early 2007.

Heins is currently the director of parish assistance for the Wisconsin Evangelical Lutheran Synod, helping congregations to evaluate their ministry - both in outreach and nurturing. Before this position, Heins served as the senior pastor for St. Johns Evangelical Lutheran Church in Wauwatosa, Wisconsin, for 14 years.


Parish Assistance Mission Statement:
It is our mission to provide personal help to congregations, groups of congregations, agencies of the church, and their leaders in identifying, meeting, and addressing Christ-centered ministry needs and issues in a manner that is true to the Scriptures, focused on Christ's mission, and within the context of their congregation and community.

Parish Assistance
A recent e-mail message from a congregational president expresses a plea for help with the words, “. . . we can no longer do things the way we have always done them. . . . We have spoken many times in recent years of reaching out to the unchurched in the community around us but have never established any kind of well organized programs or goals toward that end . . .” When congregations ask, “Can you help?” we are privileged to respond, “Yes we can!” Since 1992 several hundred congregations have sought and found the help they were looking for. Currently there are 110 congregations being served.

A vacancy remains in Parish Assistance as a result of reduced funding. Several of our 25 trained, part-time lead consultants have picked up the additional workload temporarily.

A smooth transition with the role of Parish Assistance Director passed from Dr. Ron Heins to Rev. Elton Stroh at the end of 2005. Dr. Heins continues to serve as a consultant specialist. He will be taking a four-month sabbatical in fall 2006 to serve as an instructor at our World Mission’s seminary in Hong Kong. Dr. George LaGrow served faithfully as our full-time consultant with an emphasis on Lutheran school ministry from July 2002 until his unexpected death in April 2006. Because the demand for this service (Forward With Lutheran Schools) is substantial, we plan to extend a call to fill this position as soon as possible.


You can find examples of comments from those who have worked with Parish Assistance by visiting the User Comments Web page.

Wondering about the range of services offered by Parish Assistance? More information is available by visiting our Services Web page.

For more information, contact Rev. Elton Stroh at 608-837-3819 or visit our Web site.

Staff

Rev. Elton Stroh, director
Dr. Ron Heins
Mrs. Angela Faust

Rev. Elton Stroh, reporter

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A Right Strawy Epistle from Stroh

The Parish Assistance consulting ministry was authorized by the synod in convention in 1991, at which time an increasing number of congre­gations were seeking personalized onsite assistance with a variety of issues. Today our churches—mostly struggling ones, but some stable and even growing—continue to request the services of Parish Assistance, which focuses on “Assisting God’s people with pursuing his mission.”

We believe that, under God, as we help churches become healthier, we will also help our synod become a healthier church body. This, in turn, will position our synod to expand and support our ministry efforts at home and abroad, to train and send out more workers, and to increase our poten­tial to be a greater blessing to God’s kingdom.

Our core four-phase consulting service involves helping congregations accurately analyze current reality, create a compelling vision for future min­istry, prioritize and reorganize for action, and then pursue their preferred future with trust in the Lord to bless their efforts. Leaders are especially appreciative as we help them see with clarity

what must never change (God’s message and mission),

what may change (methodology), and

what must change (anything that gets in the way of proclaiming the gospel message and pursuing Christ’s make-disciples mission).
Staffing challenges

For the past several years, but especially more recently, vacancies within Parish Assistance have presented challenges. Both full- and part-time lead consultants, in love for their Lord and for the con­gregations of our synod, overextended themselves to serve additional churches. Still, service to some congregations needed to be delayed, and now congregations are being told, "We want to serve you, but we don’t know when we will be able to because of our staffing shortage." This unfortunate situation has caused some leaders, who intended to request our services, to back away or to look for help elsewhere.

A pastor serving one of our client congregations recently sent this note: "I wanted to sincerely thank you for the long hours and dedicated, cheerful service you gave the Lord and his people here . . . I am certain the Lord will work many blessings from it! I will continue to hold you in my prayers that God will . . . enable you to continue to bring more blessings to more congregations! Thanks for the fruitful and enjoyable weekend." Bringing more blessings to more congregations is also our prayer, and we are planning for this to happen.

At this time Parish Assistance has two full-time consultants in place and two full-time vacancies. One of the two vacant positions was defunded a few years ago. The other posi­tion has funding, and we are continuing to call with confidence that the Lord will lead us to the person he has chosen. Meanwhile, plans are in place to increase our number of part-time lead consultants and to begin their formal training during the 2008 Summer Quarter at Wisconsin Lutheran Seminary. Our active part-time lead consultants will also participate in this week-long training event.

Additional consulting services

In addition to Parish Assistance’s core four-phase service, special consulting services have been provided over the years. Some examples of these services include team building, conflict transfor­mation, staffing level evaluation, lead­ership development, mentoring, coaching, merging ministries, and change management. It is now our intention to increase the availabil­ity of these and other services. To accomplish this, we are seeking the assistance of Dr. Ronald Heins (the former Parish Assistance director) and our part-time lead consultants—who by their previous ministry experiences and training are qualified to provide specialized assistance.

Forward with Lutheran Schools

Forward with Lutheran Schools is a major min­istry within Parish Assistance and is designed to assist congregations with starting new and strengthening existing daycares, preschools, Lutheran elementary schools, and high schools. Our Forward with Lutheran Schools consultant, who began his full-time service in July 2007, is Teacher Greg Schmill. He continues to serve congregations as they work through the pro­cess of analyzing the opportunities and chal­lenges of opening new preschools and Lutheran elementary schools. In addition, he is now piloting Second Wind, a streamlined school-strengthening process. As with our entire Parish Assistance consulting ministry, Forward with Lutheran Schools empha­sizes the use of programs within the church for outreach as well as nurture.

Parish Assistance had an opportunity in April to share information about its philosophy of ministry—why we do what we do the way we do it—with our Conference of Presidents. We appreciated their interest in and support of what Parish Assistance is striving to accomplish.

Turnaround churches

A future major project being undertaken by Parish Assistance, with funding from a Thrivent grant, will be a study of turnaround churches in WELS. Turnaround churches are defined as congregations between the years 1980 and 2007 that have declined at least 20 percent in worship attendance and then, by God’s grace and bless­ing, rebounded and rose above the original status (before the decline started) by at least 20 percent. In other words, turnaround churches experienced at least a 40 percent increase in worship atten­dance from the lowest point of decline.

An example of an imaginary turnaround congregation is provided in this graph.


The goal of this project is first to identify and categorize turnaround congregations—by setting, size, and age—and then study some of them in depth and discover what factor the Lord com­monly blessed among them. It is hoped that these findings will help inform and better enable our WELS consulting min­istry to assist additional congregations with pursuing turnaround.

Potentially, the discovered factors could be pre­sented at our ministerial training college and seminary and at regional seminars and district conferences. At the same time, we anticipate that the findings will be helpful not only to congre­gations that need and desire turnaround, but also to more stable congregations that desire improved health for the sake of having greater spiritual impact among their members and in their communities.

Continuing to declare his praises

As we thank our Lord for his benevolent blessings on Parish Assistance, we also entrust our chal­lenges to him. Confident that he is in control, we will continue to work tirelessly for the benefit of his kingdom and, with all our brothers and sisters in WELS, declare his praises!

For additional information, contact Rev. Elton Stroh, 608-837-3819 or elton.stroh@sab.wels.net.

Rev. Elton Stroh, reporter

***

GJ - Wisconsin Lutheran College (nickname - Our Valpo) spawned Charis, and Charis begat Church and Change.

And lo, darkness spread across the land.

Church and Change members joined hooves to create stealth Church Growth missions across WELS.

Church and Change members divert synodical offering money for their own salaries and their wild hair projects.

And there was weeping, and wailing, and gnashing of teeth.

Church and Change members study and worship with false teachers, then conspire to have Lutherans listen to their favorite theologians:

Archbishop Weakland, Roman Catholic

Martin Marty, ELCA

Leonard Sweet, Methodist New Ager

Kent Hunter, Nominal LCMS

Waldo Werning, Nominal LCMS

Ed Stetzer, Babtist

Andy Stanley, Babtist

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Anonymous has left a new comment on your post "Charis->Church and Change->Parish Services WELS":

Pastor:

Could you please not publish this, yet answer a question? I haven't seen your explanation of "babtist"? Is there an inside joke I'm missing? Why the second "b" and not a "p"?

Sorry...I'm a EE, not a M.Div. or PHD.

Thank you in advance sir.

***

GJ - I did answer this before, but I don't expect people to read every single post and memorize them as well. Lately I have been using the search function to find stuff I wrote.

I was at the Billy Graham Center at Wheaton College when the director made a distinction between Baptists and Ba-a-a-abtists. I laughed. The Baptists and the Ba-a-abtists did not.

Southern Baptists often say they are Ba-a-a-abtists. Northern Baptists are more liberal and do not affect the Southern accent.

I have been everywhere and heard the major Protestant and Catholic speakers, many of them now passed away. That, combined with doctoral studies in comparative dogmatics has given me a good perspective on what is happening. Unlike the Church and Changers, I can spell comparative.

The WELS Church and Changers think my doctoraol work gives them permission to study at Fuller Seminary and Willow Creek. But I disagree.

I was in the LCA until 1987. WELS said, "Oh, unionism is so bad. People should not even study at those bad institutions." John Seifert (now DP) made a point of wrinkling his nose in disgust whenever Missouri was mentioned. Even now it is impossible to have a conversation with a WELS pastor without the typical We-are-so-superior-to-Missouri tale being shopped.

WELS talked a big story against unionism, but the clergy have been more unionistic than ELCA and completely dishonest about it. The Wisconsin Synod is listed at Trinity Divinity School, Deerfield, Illinois, as one of its corporate sponsors - in two different areas, including Parish Assistance. Connections? A Church and Changer runs PS which hires Parish Assistants like Paul Kelm.

Going back, it is easy to track where this came from. Ron Roth was the first openly Church Growther in WELS. Kelm, Valleskey, Bivens, Hartman, and Olson followed. The second wave of Growthers came with Wisconsin Lutheran College creating Charis, which created Church and Change, which sponsored even more of the above.

In the power structure it was Wayne Mueller at the center, with Parish Services (Bruce Becker) overlapping Church and Change. Love Shack employees are Church and Changers promoting Love Shack programs and eating up synodical offerings to pay for them.

So everyone should be laughing at how the Church and Change leaders (like VP Don Patterson and his circle) run off to see Babtist Ed Stetzer. Meanwhile, other key Church and Change leaders (Parlow and Ski) fawn and worship at Andy Stanley's Babtist church.

Non-Clarification from WELS Church and Change Mole Bruce Becker

Bruce Becker, Church and Change Board Member Doubles as WELS Parish Services Honcho


WELS Pastor John Parlow with Bender, a Satanic figure who twists the Word of God. Parlow, Ski, Buske, and others went all the way to Atlanta to worship with the Babtists and learn from them. Why isn't Parlow blushing?

WELS Pastor Buske with Babtist Minister Andy Stanley

Ski, also a board member of Church and Change - with Babtist Andy Stanley. What excitement!
Witness Ski gushing about worshiping with Babtists here.

Babtist Andy Stanley is the son of Babtist E. Charles Stanley, also of Atlanta. Andy will take money from over-eager WELS pastors,
but he will not baptize babies.

Clarification From WELS:

In the Nov. 17 article, "Forum to share ministry blessings," Rev. Bruce Becker, administrator of the Board for Parish Services was quoted in regard to a recent congregational leadership forum. One question he said participants would be asked to examine was: "What factors, beyond the power of the gospel, do you believe are contributing to God's blessings of numerical growth in your congregation?"

Becker wishes to clarify that quote, saying, "Obviously, we believe and confess that only the Holy Spirit can bring about growth in the holy Christian church; only he is responsible for people being called out of the darkness of sin and unbelief into the light of the gospel."

Becker, however, draws a distinction between conversion into the holy Christian church and numerical growth in a congregation. "Individual Christians join our congregations for many reasons," he says. "Congregations may experience numerical growth because of good, solid biblical worship and preaching; because it is a warm and friendly congregation; because the congregation has a Lutheran school for their kids; or for a host of other reasons." The goal of the forum, says Becker, was to identify factors common to congregations blessed with numerical growth that have led to their ever-increasing audience for the gospel.***

GJ - At first I thought Becker was being forced to make a Lutheran statement, but he is too clever for that. His statement could be repeated by any denomination. Becker is another unionist - like Valleskey, Wayne Mueller, and the rest. A unionist loves every denomination except his own.

A Lutheran statement about this issue would be: The Holy Spirit works only through the Word and Sacraments, and never apart from the Word and Sacraments. In fact, Hoenecke said that in his Dogmatics.

An Enthusiast is someone, like Becker, who separates the work of the Holy Spirit from the Means of Grace.

I like his adverb - obviously. That is such a smirky little word to drop into a confession of Enthusiasm, as if no one could question his Lutheran identity.

A WELS pastor said that these false teachers are too slippery. "It is like nailing jello to a wall." No, not at all. The WELS ministerium should force Becker to agree with the Book of Concord and the Bible. But they will shirk their duty again.

***
PS - Ski's church name went from Solid Rock to C.O.R.E. The following may be why. The false teachers do not mind if their doctrine is plagiarized. They do mind having their official name borrowed. The original Solid Rock was hewn in Appleton, home base for Ski's new stealth mission. Shh. Tell it not in Gath.

Church History

In fall of 1980, Bill Lenz and a handful of others had a desire to reach out to lost and hurting people. They ventured out on the streets of downtown Appleton with a desire to share Christ with anyone who would listen. The Salvation Army opened its doors for use of their building, just two blocks from downtown. Small teams would meet and pray, then go out on the streets to witness. Others would stay back to host a drop-in center. In March of 1981, that outreach was officially named Solid Rock Ministries. The Salvation Army gave office space at no charge, and Bill Lenz served as Director. A 24-hour crisis call line began. Many were coming to Christ.

To The Starting of a Church - June 1982
Those involved in Solid Rock Ministries realized that although many people were being reached, not many were being followed up with. Paul's words to the Corinthians came alive in 1 Corinthians 4:15, "For if you were to have countless tutors in Christ, yet you would not have many fathers; for in Christ Jesus, I became your father through the Gospel."

We realized we needed to assume parental responsibility for those we had"birthed" in the Gospel. That led to the decision to start a church.The first Sunday of June, 1982 the New Corinthian Chapel held its first service in the Riverside Cemetery Chapel in Appleton. That Sunday there were 13 people in attendance. Rent for the cobblestone chapel was $9 per week.

TO THE VIKING THEATER - Summer 1983
After about a year, we outgrew the Cemetery Chapel. It was a big step up to rent the downtown Viking Theater at $75 per week. Sunday School classes for children were held in hallways, entry ways, and old rooms above a neighboring Chinese restaurant. After services, children got free popcorn from the theater staff.

To The First Permanent Building Downtown - November 1984 - March 1992
Originally built for Mount Olive Lutheran Church, the building on Oneida Street became a repertory theater, and was being remodeled by a small church group when we found it. We were able to take over a land contract from Mount Olive. Our services emphasized contemporary worship and relevant teaching. The emphasis was on accepting any and all who came. We also changed our name at that time from The New Corinthian Chapel to Christ The Rock Community Church.

On June 15, 1989 we made a final offer on 23 acres of land on the south side of Appleton off Plank Road, with the hope of someday building there. The church continued to grow through the many people converting to Christ. We were holding three services and still running out of room.