Saturday, January 5, 2008

Baptist Church Growth Service:
So Much Like
WELS-ELS-LCMS-ELCA




From a Baptist layman:

Speaking of my mom, we all gathered together at my brother's house in southern Ohio the last weekend of 2007 for a Christmas celebration together, part of which was attending my brother's church there in Cedarville. This church has a long history of quality and solid foundations, affiliations with the Baptist University there, and a general, overall practice of doing things as right as Baptists can. The service we attended was among the worst I've ever suffered through. We sat down, and I leaned over to Donna and said that pretty much everything that I saw was what I call the "Television Church," and that I hate every bit of it. Huge projection screens covered every wall. The organ console (which I suspect was covered in a layer of dust) was buried by not one, but two drum sets with every trap that any enthusiastic 18-year-old drummer could ever wish to bang on. "Musicians" appeared shortly before the "service" began, having donned jeans with untucked dress shirts and hair that hadn't been visited by a comb in days. There was an electric guitar and bass guitar, two drummers (I cannot call them percussionists) a violinist, and piano player, all over-miked in a room that didn't need amplification at all. Every one of them had his own audio monitor floor speaker, again completely unnecessary.

Then the event began. The violinist was so attrociously out of tune that I wanted to get up and walk out. The individual mics were obviously EQed and mixed by someone who had lost his hearing at some Greatful Dead concert in the 1980s. Awful, awful, awful. Oh, forgot the soloist. She never really sang by herself, but "led" us forcefully along. And I use the term "us" very loosely as I didn't participate. They sang campfire chorus after campfire chorus, each one more insulting to anyone with any musical training than the one before. I tried to ignore the inane "melodies" and just read the lyrics, and they didn't make any sense either. Everything was insulting to anyone with any sense of music or the English language.

Finally they morphed into the hymn Great Is Thy Faithfulness, and I thought there may yet have been hope. As you may know, this hymn is in 3/4 time. These knuckleheads sang it in 4/4 time, making the whole experience something akin to dancing with a camel under water, gimping along with an extra beat every measure. Meanwhile people both on the platform (or shall I call it a stage -- the whole thing was a show, not a worship service) and in the congregation (audience) were waving their hands in the air and swaying back and forth. I couldn't help but think of the stoners in California in the 1960s. They just looked stupid. Meanwhile the words are projected on the huge screens.

Then the pastor took the stage with his wireless mic running down his cheek and proceeded to deliver what I would consider a mediocre, 3rd-grade Sunday School lesson about Mary and Martha attending to Jesus, and Martha's getting upset that Mary wasn't helping serve. It was filled with uneducated conjectures and historically inaccurate suppositions about what they may or may not have been doing. All during this, pictures vaguely relating to the story were shown on the massive screens. They looked like a Target Store advertisement. I suppose this was intended to keep the attention of the audience since his oration certainly couldn't. This was followed by another musically useless and intelligence-insulting ditty that everyone was supposed to sing.

Donna and I made a beeline out of there lest anyone ask our opinion and force us either to lie or actually state the obvious of which everyone seemed oblivious. I managed to get my mom alone later, and she said that she had to bite her lip to keep from crying all during the chaos. I felt differently. I was insulted at having been battered by all that uselessness, and rather angry at having been forced to suffer through it all.

And there you have it. I've experience the Church Growth Movement, and it created quite a movement of a completely different kind within me. I really see little hope for the Church if this one is at the cutting edge of what's going on right now. Most of the College students attend that church, and whether they shape or are shaped by it, that is what they will think is appropriate and proper, and then go out and pastor or participate in their own churches accordingly. It sends a cold shudder down one's spine.

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The WELS layman added:

So there is a certain revulsion against the invasion of TV Techniques into even those Reformed areas that used to be respectful of what they did in a building they called Church. If only Lutherans who have the same reaction could get it together enough to call a halt to the nonsense.

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Another WELS layman:

Anonymous has left a new comment on your post "Baptist Church Growth Service: So Much Like WELS-E...":

I own THREE drum sets and I am DEEPLY upset with your comments!!! Not really:)

I have had similar experiences in some WELS churches. It usually takes me about a week to get over the angry, confused and creepy feeling, because I know the implications of what occured and where it is all going. (My wife hates it when I project the logical outcome into the future from these such things)

I do have a theory about the 3 ring circus approach with all the visuals etc. Have you ever noticed how much more you can get out of reading a book as opposed to watching the same thing on video? I find that I get a much better understanding of DETAIL when I read it.

I surmise that video in churches is a good way to DISTRACT the people so that a DUMBED DOWN version of what should be communicated can be more readily diseminated to the masses. It is also easier to slide in false doctrines to the auditory senses when the visual senses are distracted. Add the tacky, sentimental music and you can manipulate peoples emotions by using what passes as worship music. Work the emotions and you can tell them just about anything you want and their critical judgement falls flat like a badly played violin.

WELS Too

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GJ - I have noticed some educators favoring Attention Deficit Disorder by having things all over the classroom. Creating a lack of focus is not a good idea in education, worse in worship. Of course, these services are not intended to be worship. Willow Creek even promoted that idea. Sunday is for tickling and entertaining.

A printed bulletin can easily replace the movie screen and Jumbo-tron for text.

The tackiness is the direct result of abandoning the Means of Grace.

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rlschultz has left a new comment on your post "Baptist Church Growth Service: So Much Like WELS-E...":

WELS Too (anonymous):
I had a similar discussion today with my wife when I explained the logical conclusion of slowing creeping contemptible worship. Her reaction was about the same as your wife's. Emotional appeal is at the heart of the contemptible worship methods. I believe that much of the laity in the WELS is really in the dark about the historic liturgies. I wonder if many of them think that it is just another way to "do church". Also, much of this can be snuck into the church under the big umbrella of evangelism. After all, if it increases membership, what can be bad about that? Isn't one soul worth it? Who can argue with a smiley pastor and musicians that make a joyful noise?