Synod Minders

Every event has synod minders. They are the loyalists who show up uninvited to snoop around whenever Lutherans might think on their own.

I attended a conservative Lutheran meeting with Al Barry shortly after he was elected. He made it sound as if it was a hardship to address the people who worked so hard to get him elected. In the back row were about 10 minders. Synod minders pounce on people for getting to close to the real issues. They report who is at the meeting.

The late Jack Preus said WELS had a regular KGB operation. Missouri was and is no different. The same is true of the smaller sects. Family ties make it easy to meddle with other congregations. The temptation is seldom resisted now.

There are many "secret" email lists. I explored one ELS pastor's website and got into the main directory, with a page not linked on the website. The page gave directions for getting the key to encrypted emails at the next ELS gathering.

If an email list is large enough, synod minders populate it. They pretend to be friendly to the cause so they can forward mail to the bosses at the Love Shack (WELS), the Little Sect on the Prairie (ELS), or Almost-ELCA (Missouri Synod).

Sometimes people cannot figure out whether a minder is deliberately gumming up everything or just felony stupid. Either way, the minder is helping out the synod. He may have to unbutton the last few buttons of his shirt to let his gut precede him into the room, but he is close with the bosses. Abused and neglected children, when they grow up, need that kind of attention.